On this week’s ‘So You Think You’re an Adult’ segment, one woman has asked if she should move abroad with her boyfriend.

“I’m hoping you can help me,” she told Moncrieff.

“I’m 25 and I’ve been with my boyfriend for two years.

“He has a good job but has always spoken about moving away for a few years.

“This sort of seemed like a pie in the sky scenario – however, yesterday while I was in work, he texted me saying he’s accepted an internal transfer in work to the Stockholm office for two years.

“I mean, yes, we had spoken about it - but I always thought it would be for six months, max one year.

“I was so upset when I received the message in work – I'm really hurt that he told me via text message and didn’t even consult me on the decision.

“I know I’m young, but I really want this to work because I love him – am I foolish to think long distance could work?

“I’m thinking of quitting my job and going with him, although I haven’t told him this yet.

“Any advice appreciated.”

Woman at airport.

Broadcaster Barbara Scully said the woman should stay where she is and take her boyfriend’s method of communication as a warning sign the relationship wouldn't last much longer.

“Because of that fact that he texted her in work to tell her this piece of news, I have a feeling he doesn’t see this as being as important to their relationship as she does,” she said.

“From what she’s told us, it sounds like he’s going, ‘I got this opportunity, I’m happy, I’m off for two years, good luck now, see you, bye!’

“I think that that’s the crux of the matter – she seems to be kind of ready to settle down.

“I’m assuming if she’s 25, he’s probably in or around the same age – and I’d say he hasn’t a notion of settling down.”

Response

TV personality Declan Buckley said the woman should consider if her boyfriend even wants her to come with him, or if he’s just giving her notice for an inevitable breakup.

“For her own understanding of the situation, I would get her to kind of imagine her saying certain things to him,” he said.

“You’ve decided that in your worldview, in your reality, this guy loves you as much as you love him.

“So, when you say, ‘that’s amazing – you got moved to a head office, and you’re off there – I'm coming with you,’ - what do you think his response is going to be? Because she might already know what that response is.”

Barbara said the boyfriend’s behaviour was a ‘red flag’.

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