On this week’s ‘So You Think You’re an Adult’, one listener’s sex life is struggling thanks to their roommate’s decision to work from home. 

“It's a super cosy apartment [but] the drawback is it doesn't have good noise insulation so sound travels,” they told Moncrieff. 

“My housemate has the option of working on site or from home. The last few weeks they've barely left the house. 

“That doesn't give me the option of having sex with my partner - they won’t have sex if my housemate is home out of a fear of being heard.

“I can’t exactly ask my housemate to leave, can I?” 

'You’re entitled to have sex'

Writer Barbara Scully said the solution is “very simple”. 

“You just have to convince your partner to get over their fear of being heard,” she said. 

“You're paying half the rent; you’re entitled to have sex – presumably you’re not having it in the kitchen or living room. 

Barbara said the listener’s roommate has chosen to work from home themselves – and they must live with the consequences of that. 

“If [your roommate] is going to hear you, that’s not your problem,” she said. 

Couple arguing. Image: Chris Rout / Alamy Stock Photo

Broadcaster Declan Buckley said he wishes he could completely agree with Barbara. 

“In a very kind of together word, where people are self-assured enough to do what they want to do, your comment is completely true.” he said. 

“[But] we have acquired this discomfort around [sex].” 

Declan believes people are more prudish and private about their sex lives than before, and the listener’s partner is entitled to feel this way. 

“You can’t help the way you feel about that situation,” he said. 

“They might as well be in the room with you.” 

'So what if they hear a bit of grunting?'

Barbara agreed people are more prudish nowadays – but insisted people need to “get over themselves and go for it”. 

“In my house, we can hear the neighbours turn on the light switch,” she said. 

“I'm sure the housemate knows you have sex – so what if they hear a bit of grunting? 

“In one sense we seem to have come leaps and bounds and in other senses we’re going backwards.”