Most people view their personality as an integral part of themselves – but is it possible to alter it in any way?

Psychologist and expert in personality change at the University of Illinois Brent Roberts told Lunchtime Live that – contrary to popular consensus – we can actually change our personalities.

“It’s never been a situation where you’re stuck with something,” he said.

“The real question, I think, or the real surprise in some respects is that you can actually do it, given the expectations that people have that you can’t.

“Some of the research has been pretty clear that if you actually go about trying to change yourself, you can.

“This is not to say that you can transform yourself into a different person and that you can do it overnight.”

Female best friends talking and eating in a cafe. Image: Tatiana Terekhina / Alamy. 12 July 2023

Mr Roberts said it is still not fully clear what forms our personality, but it is likely a product of our environment.

“We’d like to say that it’s parenting practices and things of that sort,” he said.

“But to be honest with you, when I’m in a less than optimistic mood, I call it death by a thousand cuts.

“Everything that we see seems to have a really small signal, like your parents and the way they treated you, the socioeconomic status around you, your birth order, the friends you had, the experiences that you had all seem to register, but register in very small ways.”

'Our personalities are our biggest addiction'

According to Mr Roberts, we shouldn’t become too obsessed with pinning down our exact personality type.

“The fact of the matter is our personalities are our biggest addiction,” he said.

“We get caught up in them and they are what we are and one of the best things you can do is come to accept who you are and find out what that is.

“But, you know, our world is defined by our personality in many respects, and it’s sometimes difficult to get out of our own skin and to see where it can go.”

Mr Roberts said that the way people perceive themself is "really powerful".

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