How do parents cope when their children break up with their partner? 

For many parents, it is a blessed relief when their child finally decides to divorce or break up with a partner that has been making them miserable for years. 

For other families, they mourn the loss of a person who they grew to love over many years. 

“They’re kind of part of the family and as parents of adult children, you make an effort to be nice to them, to be good to them, to include them,” psychologist Stephanie Regan told The Pat Kenny Show. 

“And then that can be over; the point is - and I hear it quite a bit - people struggle not only with the ending. 

“You’re not allowed to have that love, you’ve no right to it, so to speak. 

“So, nobody wants to hear how you feel.” 

Ms Regan said she has a friend whose son has just married for the third time and is having to build a relationship all over again with a new daughter-in-law. 

“She’s onto her third relationship with her son,” she said. 

“He’s having his third wife and she’s saying, ‘And here I go again. I love these girls and then I have to let them go.’”

Ms Regan said this is always a "difficult situation" and it's always "hard not to compare" the new and the old partner. 

"Grief sounds too big," she said.

"It's not your relationship, it's your son's relationship but it's a loss - let's put it that way.

"Of course, your primary interest is in supporting [your child] but it's what you do with your own feelings.

"I think it's just to [important] to acknowledge that."

Main image: A couple with their child and their partner. Picture by: Alamy.com