On this week's 'Parenting' segment on the Moncrieff show, one listener sought advice about her sons who seem to always be at odds. 

Joanna Fortune, psychotherapist specialising in Child & Adult Psychotherapy, joined Moncrieff to answer this and other listeners' questions.

The question:

"I have three and six-year-old boys and a new baby boy coming in a few weeks."

"There has always been jealousy and sibling rivalry between the boys, but I feel the main source origin has to be us, the parents. I am concerned how this will effect my kids relationships with each other and our relationships with them as they grow. "

"There is constant bickering, tattling, winding each other up. Frustration and emotions go from 0-100 very quickly often resulting, in hitting & calling each other names and complete melt downs.   "

"I've tried to stay out of all arguments but almost always need to step in to separate if it gets physical. I would say my husband finds it harder to stay neutral as one is older & bigger, its easy to start to place blame and expect too much from him"

"Do you have any tips on staying neutral, what language to use when an argument starts between the kids and the bigger picture in regards to preventing/dealing with this?"

Joanna's advice:

"I'm not sure is there something that we're missing or are you taking on a lot of responsibility for something that really is part of sibling dynamics."

"Siblings are our first experience of best friends and enemies."

"We get to work out a whole lot of those social dynamics with siblings."

"At six and three, that's a world of difference developmentally."

"They're playing in different ways so they're getting on each other's nerves, they're misunderstanding each other."

"That's how they're getting to know each other."

Getting involved

"At three and six, you can't stay out of it. They can't work that out themselves."

"Your three-year-old is not in any way self-regulating but nor is your six-year-old."

"They need you to come in and be the thermostat in the room."

"I'm curious how much time you get to spend together as a family."

"Spending time together as a family teaches them how to enjoy each other and work together rather than work against each other in play."

"Then make sure you get one-to-one time at some point in the day, or at least week, with each of the kids."

Main image shows two brothers play fighting at home. Picture by: Westend61 GmbH/Alamy