On this week's 'Parenting' segment on the Moncrieff show, one listener sought advice about their teenage daughter's issues with body confidence since gaining weight. 

Joanna Fortune, psychotherapist specialising in Child & Adult Psychotherapy, joined Moncrieff to answer this and other listeners' questions.

The question:

"My daughter is really struggling with the return to school."

"She's in second year and there's no denying that she put on some weight this summer, and since she went back to school last week, she's come home crying every day saying she hates how she looks and she feels like everyone is looking at her."

"She is teary going into school every morning, and today she begged me to let her stay home."

"I don't want to make her weight a big issue, but if I tell her that she can lose weight if that's what's worrying her, am I then telling her that her self worth comes from how she looks?"

"She's smart, funny and talented in music so I know she's got so much going for her, but these things don't seem to matter to her right now."

Joanna's advice:

"That summer between first and second year, so much changes. And I'm not just talking about bodies I'm talking about socially, emotionally so much changes."

"We tend to see a significant shift in friendships and connections."

"Some of them are, you know, ready to push a few boundaries, let's call it take a few risks. Others are very much still at the 'do as you're told' stage."

"All of that's fine, but it can cause a myriad of social difficulties in school."

Back to routine

"I do hear in this look, she she has gained some weight over the summer."

"Unless you're doing loads of camps and loads of activities and in loads of clubs, there's a lot of kind of sitting still not doing a whole lot of movement during the summer."

"So some of this may sort itself out when she returns to her normal schedule in school, you know, getting school, getting home, PE classes, sports."

Walks

"No matter how old our children are, no matter how how old any of us are, to be honest, focus on what your body can do

"Ask her for example, just gently, to keep you company on a walk because you find it helpful to shake off the day."

"A healthy body is not necessarily a slim body. Like we challenge that mindset as well."

"Be interested in what's interesting her because it teaches her she's an interesting person, and all of that improves self esteem."

"And when you feel better internally about yourself in terms of who you are, how you are, what you look like genuinely does become secondary."

Be curious

"I think you want to reflect with her because she is saying 'I don't want to go to school'.

"So reflect that you've seen how upset she is and wonder what might be underpinning the upset."

"Say: Look, I've seen you're really upset. You're wanting to avoid school. I'm curious what is behind this?"

"Ask her what has changed since last year, assuming she was happy in school last year, and what does she now want to change."

"I would be making her an active partner as an agent of her own change."

Main image shows a young woman weighing herself. Tero Vesalainen/Alamy