A teenager who was told she would have to wait two to three years to see a specialist has said she did not know where to turn.
Megan O'Rourke, who is now 19, from Co Wexford said she needed help from the Child & Adolescent Mental Health Service (CAMHS) at the age of 15.
She told The Hard Shoulder: "I was just going 15 when I first needed the help from CAMHS - I had been seeing specialists beforehand, but that was kind of on our own back, it wasn't in the HSE system.
"When I first went to CAMHS, we were told that I could be [on] a two to three year waiting list.
"I needed to be admitted into a service straight away - at that time I was suicidal, I was self-harming.
"I just wasn't myself at all; I was curled up in the corner of my room.
"I was sick and I needed help, and to be told then that you're stuck to a two to three year waiting list to see a specialist - it's not OK.
"If someone had a heart attack and they ring the hospital, they're not going to turn around and say 'Come back in two and three years'.
"And it's the same thing - you're talking about life or death when it comes to being suicidal."
Megan said her parents were lobbying both the HSE and local TDs.
"They basically had said that it was over-crowded, there wasn't enough doctors or specialists or anything on site.
"And it was just simply the services wasn't there.
"I was in serious need of help - I was only after coming back from a suicide attempt, I had to be seen.
"My mam rang every day crying, and was like 'My daughter needs help'.
"My dad is a postman so when he was out on his rounds, he used to go in and talk to the local TDs and try and get them onboard.
"Just to try and get us in some way... the Mayor of Wexford helped us big time as well.
"With everyone's help we eventually got in - and I was already classed as an emergency case, but I was still waiting six week from then to my initial appointment".
'Appointment for eight weeks' time'
But Megan said the psychiatrist was not working the day of her first appointment, while the second visit also had some issues.
"When I had walked in and sat down, I think we were about an hour in there, and obviously at the time because I was so sick I wasn't very talkative.
"It took me a while to get comfortable around people and actually express what was going on.
"And she told me that I'd be better in three months time, which was the summer, and handed me a few leaflets and told me that things would get better.
"I was sent out, home, again where I was given an appointment for eight weeks' time where we'd have a follow up".
Megan said while there are therapists on site, this is often not what is needed.
"But when you're sick you're going to need a diagnosis, you're going to need to be seen by a psychiatrist to fully understand what's going on inside your own head".
She said this was the cycle she was in until she turned 18 and was too old for CAMHS.
Megan said she is still engaging with mental health services.
"I see my own therapist on the side, which we pay for, and I'm also after being brought in to the Cairn House service - that's kind of where you go when you leave CAMHS.
"It's not exactly much better, you could even say it's kind of worse".
She said this is because of another long waiting list.
"You go in, you have your appointment, you could be brought back in four weeks because it was just your first appointment there.
"After that four weeks, it could be eight months, it could be six months by the time you're called back.
"I had a call with them over the phone about four weeks ago, and I was told that I'll be seen again in November".
Megan added that it is hard to know where to turn, when the service meant to help you doesn't.
"I was clinging on to the tinniest bit of hope when I was 15, and I was told that these people were going to help me and they didn't.
"Where do you turn when the people who are specialised in that area can't even help, you feel lost".
Anyone affected by issues raised in this article can call Pieta House on 1800-247-247 or text 'HELP' to 51444.
You can also contact Aware at 1800-80-48-48 or The Samaritans on 116-123.
