As that eminent philosopher, Kermit the Frog, once mused, it’s not easy being green. As we head into this most green of weekends it may be time to interrogate that sweeping generalization. Being Irish is gonna be a piece of cake this weekend. Everything is going green.

Now there’s a thing.

Our lovely cousins from America have thrown up this video:

When I first saw them, my ingrained nationalism kicked in and I thought How Dare They. But then again after a 2nd viewing you have to agree they are making sense. When I was growing up parades in Ireland were pretty abysmal. Think of the St Patrick’s Day parade in Father Ted.

Gloria Huniford changed that.

It was the early 80s. Wee Gloria was still with UTV and they actually decided to do a live outside broadcast from the New York parade. On a dark cold March at tea-time we saw splashes of green, marching bands, green beer, the green river - we were sold. Ok it was another 25 odd years before we finally got organising our own damn fine festival that lasts 3 days.

The claim about corn beef and cabbage? Well, as that lovely Irish man with the Scottish voice says in the video - it’s BACON and cabbage. But that was a minor sin. Using Joe Duffy as a voice of reason, well that’s another matter. But, hey, they are yanks...

The second video should really make Undaunted cringe and the #irelandinspires should push my vomit button but watch it:

I actually did gasp about Newgrange and our Nobel Laureates. The cultural purloining of Daniel Day Lewis was cheesy but hey for the day that’s in it! The interesting use of economic facts was a bit creative. What do they say about lies, damn lies and statistics? But hey it’s our day. We can do anything we want.

You want some cultural colonialism? Hey we can do that too. You give us some of your most iconic cultural and tourist sites and we’ll bathe them in green floodlights. Whoever thought of this one is a genius. We’re here and we’re damn green. We’re even going to dress the Manneken Pis statue in Brussels like a Leprachaun and have him do his thing. Just like Dublin so.

And in Paris, home of everything très, très chic and profound, 15 green-clad giants will hopefully soar and sparkle and be crowned Six Nations Champions after a hat-trick by our number 13. Hey, we’re Irish. We can do anything right?

Kermit, you were wrong. It’s damn fine and dandy being green!