Irish people have 'no filter' when it comes to speaking to new parents, a father of two has said.
A debate has opened up about how well-meaning but poorly chosen comments can be received quite negatively.
The period following the birth of a new baby is particularly sensitive for new parents.
On Lunchtime Live today Siobhan O’Neill-White from Mams.ie recalled one particular incident.
"My daughter was about three months old and somebody saw me from across the street and rang my grandmother to tell her that I was pregnant again," she said.
"It wasn't malicious but I obviously still had a bit of a bump there.
"This is my third child and you certainly don't snap back as quickly your third and fourth."
'I was really hurt'
Ms O’Neill-White said she doesn't understand why someone would talk to a family member first.
"I was really hurt that somebody would see me and assume I was pregnant," he said.
"Then not only would think it to themselves but would actually tell a family member and then I have to tell that person, 'No I'm not pregnant'.
"That wasn't nice, I didn't like that".
Ms O’Neill-White said people should just think before they speak.
"Life is much more difficult to handle when you're tired," she said.
"No amount of coffee can make up for not having a good sleep.
"So when someone is exhausted just think before you say something really stupid that's going to offend because some things do stay with you".
'A real lack of empathy'
Father-of-two Jason said men also often have to put up with comments.
"People are quick to say [that] as a dad you'll never know how to change a nappy, you'll never get up and do the night feed - it's that kind of thing," he said.
"Irish people just have no filter and we're supposed to be such kind people.
"There's a real lack of empathy when it comes to mothers with newborns."
Jason said one group are always quick to give advice without even realising it.
"The grandparents of newborns - they're so quick to give advice to a new mother and make them feel bad," he said.
"They just need to learn to do it themselves without being told they're doing it wrong."
'Seen and not heard'
Nikki in Roscommon said she was recently on a train home from Dublin.
"I had my baby with me and he's my first, and he was calm for the whole train journey," she said.
"In the same carriage this woman and her child was having a bit of a hard time.
"This old dear turned around [to me] and she said, 'Oh you've got a great baby not making a bit of noise'.
"I felt really sorry for the other parent in the carriage."
Nikki said she thinks society has changed in its outlook on children.
"I think sometimes the comparison that people make between people's children isn't helpful," she said.
"I think in older times there was a saying that children should be seen and not heard; in today's society we're a bit more like, 'Let children be free and have fun'".
Nikki added that even though some people mean well "comparing Baby A to Baby B" isn't something that should be done.
Listen back here:
