Diarmuid Molloy is on temporary release from Dublin’s Wheatfield Prison, where he has been serving his third prison sentence. A heroin addict since his 21st birthday, the 34-year-old says that he’s had no life since that day.
“I regret a lot of things,” Molloy told Pat Kenny in studio this week, opening up about how prison has impacted his life. “But there’s days when I didn’t regret it. Because sometimes you enjoy that life, because you’re used to it.”
Addiction has fuelled Molloy’s life, controlling it, taking it in what seem to be inevitable directions. Growing up in state care, he started smoking cannabis at the age of 15, graduating to cocaine and ecstasy. When he left care, he could not read or write, and turned to crime to fund his addiction, robbing as much as €300 a day to feed his habit.
After a six year stint in jail for selling drugs, Molloy had just three weeks out before his next four-year sentence started. He saw his son Jake just once during those three weeks. A letter from Jake, kept by a prison guard till Christmas morning, would prove to be a turning point in Diarmuid Molloy’s life. Written in the scrawling handwriting of a six-year-old, Jake asked his father to turn away from drugs and start his life afresh.
“That’s the first time I’ve ever had somebody... anybody... wanting me, do you know,” Diarmuid said, opening up about this period in his life. “I was always for me, and for the first time I realised, ‘Damn, you’ve a child... a son that loves you...’.”
“I wanted to change my life.”
Diarmuid read that letter every morning after that to remind him of what he needed to do. While inside, he completed his Junior and Leaving Certificates, as well as a FETAC course, gaining enough points to start a college course in Liberties College – and earing him his temporary release in order to attend. It hasn’t been easy; Methadone treatments mixed with extensive application forms and uncertainty over how it will all be financed.
But Diarmuid has found solace with his family, reuniting the mother of his second child, Martin, and looking forward to the arrival of another baby in the summer.
On going straight, he recognises difficulties times are coming, but remains hopeful. “When you do try to get clean, grab it with two hands.”
Molloy says that this is his chance to become someone, to become a member of society. He’s due to finish his sentence this month after signing on every week in the prison service since being granted temporary release in August. His story, complete with the letter that changed his life, will feature in TV3’s Prison Families documentary, airing on Monday February 2nd.
You can hear Diarmuid’s interview, along with former Mountjoy Prison governor John Lonergan, in the podcast below.
